In an excerpt from Who Knew, published Monday in New York Magazine, the 83-year-old Diller reflects on his past same-sex relationships and his complex but enduring love for von Fürstenberg, calling their romance “the miracle of my life.”
“While there have been a good many men in my life, there has only ever been one woman,” Diller writes. “She didn’t come into my life until I was 33 years old.”
Diller, the chairman of IAC and Expedia Group, has been married to von Fürstenberg since 2001.
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Their relationship, which began in the 1970s and spanned periods of separation and reconciliation, has long intrigued the media, particularly given speculation about Diller’s sexuality.
Though Diller says he lived much of his adult life as “more or less openly gay,” he admits he feared publicly acknowledging it due to the stigma of the time. “Fear of exposure still had a tyrannical hold on me,” he writes. “It stunted any chance of my having a fulfilling personal life.”
He also acknowledged that the passionate and spontaneous nature of his relationship with von Fürstenberg defied explanation. “I also liked guys, but that was not a conflict with my love for Diane,” he states. “In some cosmic way, we were destined for each other.”
Their relationship has weathered decades, including a 10-year separation and rumours of infidelity, but Diller describes it as the “bedrock” of his life.
The pair were most recently seen together at the 2024 Met Gala, a rare public moment for a couple that has lived largely on their own terms.
In his memoir, Diller also reflects on how shifting cultural attitudes have made space for more fluid identities. “Sexual identities are much more fluid and natural now,” he writes, “without all those rigidly defined lanes of the last century.”
Who Knew will be released on 20 May.
“Much has been written about us, whispered about us, wondered about us,” Barry Diller writes about his 50-year relationship with Diane von Fürstenberg. Diller answers questions about his marriage and sexuality in an excerpt from his upcoming memoir, Who Knew. pic.twitter.com/iqUjZYRXHp
— New York Magazine (@NYMag) May 6, 2025